


Savior

by featherandblade



Category: Final Fantasy VIII
Genre: F/M, First Time, Romantic Fluff, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-29
Updated: 2020-02-29
Packaged: 2021-03-12 20:55:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22957390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/featherandblade/pseuds/featherandblade
Summary: A year after the events of Final Fantasy VIII, a slightly more socially comfortable Squall feels like he has finally achieved the openness desired from him. That is, until one night, when a wisp of spontaneity inspires an idea in Rinoa that challenges Squall to open up in ways that he's never done before. Will Squall overcome this new challenge or will he once again crumble beneath his fears?
Relationships: Rinoa Heartilly/Squall Leonhart
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	1. An Unexpected Invitation

Squall savored the sound of the waltz fading behind him as he made his way from the ballroom to the dim, empty halls of Balamb Garden. It had been a long night for the young Commander. Too many speeches made, too many hands shook, and certainly too many of Irvine's inappropriate jokes followed by too many of Quistis' stern rebukes. The more he recalled the noise from the evening, the more eager he was to turn in for the night. Only the sound of Rinoa's heels clicking beside him filled his ears now, the presence of which was certainly welcome.

They walked in comfortable silence, during which Squall quietly reflected on how much his life had changed in recent years. It wasn't too long ago - just about a year or so - when he first donned the uniform that he wore now. Who would have predicted that in that short amount of time, he would go from a rookie SeeD member to the Commander of the entire Garden? Even more, he wondered, who would have thought that he himself would change so much? There were facets of his life now that would have been unimaginable back when he was seventeen. Selphie's giggles and Zell's loud mouth were no longer just things to tolerate during missions. Instead, they had become normal, almost daily features of his life. Add to that a quirky, former Galbadian soldier turned president of the largest, most innovative city currently known to man - who turned out to be his biological father - and his old self might as well never have existed.

A quiet, musing smile spread on Squall's lips as Rinoa started humming the waltz they danced to earlier. He secretly found it amusing that she could never last too long in silence. Thinking back to his previous train of thought, he started wondering about her most. How could he have imagined that the same girl who randomly forced him to dance at his SeeD graduation over a year ago would now be walking the halls with him, holding his hand and swinging it back and forth? He wasn't completely oblivious to himself. Even back then, he detected a slight tinge of attraction towards her. He just never imagined she would become more than just a stranger. Even more, he never imagined that a small attraction would become so much more.

"You're becoming such a good dancer!" Rinoa teased.

"You're a good teacher," He replied. "Aren't you tired? You danced a lot tonight."

"Nope! I would have danced all night long if you weren't such a party pooper!"

"You know you could have stayed. I wouldn't have minded."

"And let you escape only to get lost in that secretive little head of yours? Not a chance!" Rinoa released his hand and skipped ahead of him. "We're just gonna have to have our own little party here!"

Rinoa winked at him, then turned around and ran off into the dormitory hallway. Squall sighed and shook his head. She was always joking around and pulling pranks on him. That was another thing to wonder about. Who would have imagined that quiet, stony Squall would end up with someone so mischievous and silly? Then again, who was he kidding? He kind of loved that about her.

He put his hands in his pockets and walked patiently towards where she disappeared.

* * *

Rinoa was sitting on one of the ledges in the dormitory hallway by the time he found her. She had been entertaining herself by staring at her feet as she playfully swung them back and forth.

"Finally!" She said when she saw him. She hopped off the ledge, adjusted her dress, brushed down her hair, and held her arms out.

Squall tilted his head and stared at her.

"Dance with me!"

"There's no music."

"So what?"

"And it's really late."

"So...?"

"And someone might see us and think we're crazy."

Rinoa shook her head and put her hands on her hips.

"Squall," she chided, "Can't you just be silly and irresponsible for once?"

He narrowed his eyes in response, but Rinoa could see his lips betraying a hint of a smile. This was enough encouragement. She planted her feet firmly on the ground and held her arms out once more. "Well? What are you waiting for?"

Squall stared at her, realizing that she must have chosen this spot due to its atmosphere. Unlike most of the others, the dormitory hallway was open to the courtyards and thus to moonlight. It was romantic. Even he could see that. He, however, wasn't entirely averse to it. The moonlight was casting a soft, bluish glow against Rinoa's figure, and he liked it.

To Rinoa's surprise, he approached and gently placed one hand on her waist and took her hand with the other. Her eyes widened with excitement as she realized that he was actually - unexpectedly - giving in to her request. With her body reeling with energy at the prospect of a dance, she braced herself as Squall pulled her close, lifted her hand, and then...

Nothing.

The last thing Rinoa saw was a twinkle in his eye before, in one sweeping motion, he pulled her in and locked his arms around her. He held her so close and so tightly that she couldn't wriggle free when she tried. It dawned on her immediately: he wasn't about to dance with her, he was about to arrest her!

He drew his face close to hers, smirking. "Like I said. It's TOO LATE for dancing. We need to get you back to your hotel."

Rinoa glared at him, her eyes wide with shock at the thought of easily falling for his ruse. Still tangled in his arms, she sheepishly stuck her tongue out at him, but he only found it amusing. He retaliated by planting a kiss on her forehead.

"See?" He said, laughing softly as his lips brushed against her skin, "I can be funny too."

Another sweeping motion, and Rinoa found herself being dragged back towards the main hall, her hand secured by his tight grip, as if she were a child being dragged away from a park.

* * *

Rinoa stared at the back of Squall's head as he led her down the hallway. She momentarily considered pulling a prank in revenge, but she decided against it. Maybe he was right. Maybe it _was_ too late for shenanigans.

The quietness of the night started seeping into Rinoa's mind, extinguishing any last traces of mischief. No longer interested in poking fun at Squall, she entertained her restless mind by looking around. Curiously, her eyes always landed back on him. She couldn't see his face, but she could picture it perfectly - serious, unemotional, brows furrowed above a set of piercing blue eyes, gazing into the distance, lost in whatever thought might be whirling around his head. She could see why most people found him standoffish, but she kind of liked that about him.

She stared at him more - at the soft hair, the slender neck, the broad shoulders. She gazed at the way his SeeD uniform fit him, capturing the wideness of his torso while making way for the slenderness of his waist. Suddenly, a small bubble of a thought rose to the surface, making her blush at its arrival. It wasn't the first time the thought crossed her mind, but it was the first time that it tugged palpably within her. She wondered what caused it to manifest now. Was it just a silly, inspired wisp of spontaneity brought on by the romantic quiet of the night? Or has it been bubbling beneath the surface for longer than she realized? Before she knew it, she stopped dead in her tracks.

Squall turned around, startled by the slight tug at his arm. He was even more puzzled when he found her staring blankly at him.

"Is everything okay?" He asked.

She didn't answer. She could only at gaze at him, growing more starry-eyed by the second. Soon the dreamy look on her face culminated in her putting her hands behind her back and swaying playfully side to side.

Squall frowned, wondering if she was setting him up for another one of her pranks.

"What is it, Rinoa?" He asked more firmly than before.

"Oh, nothing." She said.

It was definitely _not_ nothing, Squall thought. He recognized that motion all too well - she only swayed whenever had _something_ on her mind. He shrugged his shoulders and waited.

Rinoa could no longer contain herself. She glided over to him and started playing with the chain across his uniform, all the while biting her lip to suppress a mischievous smile.

"I was wondering..." She said slowly, "...if I could stay over tonight?"

Squall frowned at first, puzzled by her request. Then, just as he opened his mouth to ask, the look in her eyes registered.

He froze.

It took every fiber of Rinoa's being not to laugh at the look on his face. It was as if someone cast Stop on him. "Wait," She giggled, helpless against her amusement, "ARE YOU BLUSHING?"

"N-no..." He said quickly. Determinedly.

It was no use, Squall thought. Even he could feel himself coloring. At the very least, he was glad that the others weren't here. Quistis would have translated every expression on his face, Selphie would have giggled to death, and goodness knows the unimaginable, inappropriate things that would have come out of Irvine's mouth. Strangely enough, he predicted Zell's reaction to be the most sensible of the group. He would have tried desperately to change the subject or point out something random. Or he would have ran away, which Squall almost felt an instinct to do right now. If only Rinoa wasn't holding on to the chain on his uniform...

"So?" She prodded, her eyes expectant and glittering.

"Y-yeah..." Squall heard himself say. "Of course..."


	2. A Cute, Smiling Caterchipillar

Squall gazed absent-mindedly throughout the dim space of his bedroom as he changed out of his uniform. He could hear Rinoa humming from the bathroom, and it made him wonder how much longer he had to prepare.

_Prepare…?_ He scoffed.

He searched his mind for options, but it proved futile. She'd been to his place a thousand times. She knew every corner, every book, every casually strewn pen. She even knew how to get into his gunblade case - an honor never revealed to anyone except her. Still, he wondered if he should do something different. After all, _this_ night is different. And not knowing what to expect was driving him mad.

He glanced around the room, almost desperate to find something - anything - that might need his attention. In the end, all he could do was walk over to his desk and straighten a stack of _Weapons Monthly _magazines. It was no use. His room was already neat to begin with. If anything, Rinoa was the one who had a habit of scattering her stuff around.

The bathroom door slid open, washing the dim bedroom in a bright, florescent light. Rinoa appeared in the the doorway, the light behind her creating an almost heavenly glow around her silhouette. Squall noticed immediately that she was wearing the shirt he gave her earlier. He thought it was strange how it was hardly shorter than the dress she was wearing at the ball, and yet it made a world of a difference.

They stared at each other silently for a moment when suddenly, she started laughing.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing… It's just that… I've seen you fight all sorts of monsters in battle and yet this is the most terrified I've ever seen you."

Rinoa felt guilty for laughing, but she couldn't deny it. He looked like a deer caught in headlights.

_That's because there's no training for this kind of thing_, Squall wanted to say.

"There you go again, thinking to yourself."

"Sorry."

Again, another beat. Squall shifted uncomfortably where he stood, not knowing what to do with himself. The sight of his discomfort made Rinoa tender, and she suddenly didn't feel like laughing at him anymore.

"You know we don't have to do anything if you're not comfortable…" She said quietly to him. She flicked the bathroom lights off, walked over to the bed, and sat down. "We can just sleep."

Squall didn't know what to say, and for once, his silence made her uneasy too.

In an obvious effort to put him at ease, she jumped under the blankets and playfully buried herself until only her head poked out. The white sheets wrapped around her like a sleeping bag, and Squall randomly thought she looked like a Caterchipillar. A cute, smiling Caterchipillar.

Her silliness achieved its desired effect, and she was glad to see his lips stretch out into a smile.

"Come on!" She said cheerfully.

He walked over and climbed in bed, slowly navigating himself over and around her. As he did, he realized that this was the first time in his life that he's ever had to climb in bed this way. Heck, this was the first time he ever had anyone in it. He stole a glance at her, somewhat conscious that he might have looked awkward, but he only found her resting happily against his pillow. He finally made his way to the spot behind her, and in an inadvertent - almost completely involuntary - motion, he slid his arm around her waist. He wondered immediately if that was inappropriate, but she welcomed it by snuggling further into the nook that was his body.

"You're a natural at spooning!" She said.

"Thanks."

They both let out a sigh. As the silence settled around them, Squall found himself wondering what was going on in her head. For as long as he could remember, she had never been quiet for more than five minutes. Now here she was, perfectly at ease with the silence that passed between them. He secretly envied her as he realized that his heart was hammering against his chest. She was right. It _was _strange that he's never been nervous in battle yet he felt every bit terrified now.

_What the hell is wrong with me?_

Minutes passed, and Squall found himself overthinking every detail that lay before him. He's never been this close to her before. He's kissed her many times, held her hand, carried her on his back. Heck, he's even held her in space. But this was an entirely different level of closeness. He's never felt his legs tangled with hers, never had her back cradled so closely against him, never had her curves so thinly veiled beneath the light layers of an undershirt. His thoughts wandered over to every little detail of her presence - the warmth of her skin, the scent of her hair, the dip between her neck and her shoulder...

A crease developed between Squall's brows as he thought back to the look she had on her face earlier that night. It was one thing for her to look so mischievous and sultry, but it was an entirely different matter that she looked so...hopeful. Did he let her down? He frowned further, damning the discomfort he felt. He wondered now if he could try something - anything - to give her what she wanted. He managed to slip an arm around her waist, didn't he? There must being something else he could do. He tried to move his hand, but his fingers didn't even twitch. He was paralyzed.

In a sudden rush of emotions, he felt disappointment overcoming him. It was no use, he thought. It took him more than a year to open up to people, to friends, to Rinoa - and that was a magnitude of a task for someone like him. Compared to that, this just felt impossible.

He lifted his head slightly to get a glimpse of her face. Her eyes were closed.

_I guess it really is just sleep, then..._ He thought. _I'm pathetic. __Sorry, Rinoa..._

* * *

Squall had just begun to feel the tender relief of sleep when he suddenly felt Rinoa stir. Without opening her eyes, she shifted until she ended up completely turned around, her face only inches from his. He lay there, stunned, wondering if she had woken up. Several minutes of silence passed, which he spent staring at her as she slept. He watched the way her chest rose up and down, the way her lashes rested against her cheeks. She looked peaceful. Beautiful.

Suddenly, her lips parted and his name came out in a whisper.

"Squall…"

He responded hesitantly. "Yeah?"

She was quiet for a moment and didn't opened her eyes when she spoke.

"I'm glad I met you..."

Squall lay stunned at the words that came out of her. It wasn't the first time she'd said that to him, but there was something about the suddenness of it from such a close range that consumed him, like water slowly filling an empty cup. He was suddenly struck by a thought: this was the first time he's seen her sleep since...

His face tensed at the memory.

It was the first time he saw her sleep since Ultimecia possessed her then cast her aside, as if she were a worthless thing.

His chest tightened at the recollection. Rinoa. Asleep. In a coma. Her eyes shut so surely that they threatened never to open again. Her lips sealed so quietly that they threatened never to fill his ears with her voice again.

Something awakened inside Squall, and he stared at her intently now, slowly being overpowered by an urgent need to be with her even though she was only inches away. He leaned in and kissed her, waking her from her sleep.


	3. Savior

They kissed slowly at first.

Rinoa had never been kind to those who startled her in her sleep, but it was evident now that Squall kissing her would be an unequivocal exception.

His warmth... His gentleness... These were sensations made all the more intimate as they revealed themselves from beneath his icy exterior. Here was quiet, unfriendly Squall, holding her face in his hands, kissing her softly.

Moments went by, and the warmth that Rinoa felt made way for something new: heat. First she felt it on her lips, then it manifested in her chest, and eventually it spread to the rest of her body. The excitement from earlier that evening returned - that same, palpable craving that went beyond a mere desire to be near him.

Her arms made their way around his neck, her fingers running through his soft hair. Consumed by his presence, she pushed her body up against his, holding him tighter as she kissed him more passionately by the second.

Squall was equally lost in her. When she kissed him hard, he kissed harder. When she pushed herself against him, he pulled her in with his arms. When she ran her hand through his hair, he ran his hands up and down her back.

Together they allowed themselves to be consumed, losing themselves to each other amidst the heat of their bodies tangling together.

Rinoa took his face into her hands and led him aside, beckoning him to shift until he ended up on top of her. She melted beneath his weight - his face hovering above hers and strands of his hair brushing her forehead and her cheeks. They kissed some more.

Squall's mind was now turning into a frenzy, with one thought springing after another, sometimes clashing with each other. He wanted to hold her so tightly that she could never slip away, but he also wanted to hold her so softly for fear of crushing her. He wanted to kiss her, he wanted to hold her, he wanted to look at her - he wanted everything at once as long as it was _her. _

One thought raced after another, each with its own depth, own randomness, own meaning. Suddenly, one thought triumphed above the rest and flashed to the forefront of his mind. It mocked him like an Imp smirking at him while wiggling its pointy tail.

He stopped kissing her and pulled back.

"What's wrong?" She asked, touching his cheek out of concern.

"Rinoa, I..." He tried speaking, but it was hard to get the words out. "I..."

Her big, brown eyes watched him innocently. The more loving they were, the harder it became for him to speak. He forced himself to say it.

"...I've never done this before..."

Rinoa sighed in relief and smiled. "Squall, it's okay," she assured him, "This is my first time, too."

Squall knew that her words should have made him feel better, but there was something about the casualness in her tone that somehow made it sting more. He couldn't quite identify what was holding him back suddenly. Whatever it was, it was buried deep in the recesses of his being. The only thing he knew for sure was the last time he felt it, and that was before he met her.

"Squall?" She called, suddenly concerned again.

"I'm sorry," He said quietly. "I just... I don't want to disappoint you."

Squall felt a pang of shame as the words left him. Here was Commander Squall: leader of the SeeDs, protector of the Garden, Knight to his Sorceress... A proud lion. Here was that same Squall, paralyzed and completely powerless before the only person who could take him down. He felt himself recoiling from her, drowning in his own thoughts along the way.

Rinoa saw all of it unfold in his eyes, and suddenly, it was as if time had frozen. For the first time ever, she witnessed what she had heard from others many times before.

_Squall has always had the most expressive eyes. _Quistis and Ellone once told her. _You might always find him fighting with others or keeping to himself, but if you really look, you'll see it. It's always there in his eyes._

Rinoa softened as she witnessed it now. Squall's eyes - icy blue and all too often distant - now revealed his vulnerability. Every bit of it was there - the loneliness, the fear of losing those he loved, the desperate desire to build up walls... All this time, Rinoa thought that the little boy inside him had gone, but she realized now that he would always be there.

Squall looked away in shame, sensing what she saw. The sight of him recoiling further away from her struck her like a silent lightning bolt.

Through the most perilous times of her life, it had always been Squall who saved her. It was he who carried her unconscious body across a bridge to find her only chance of survival. It was he who dove freely into outer space after she was cast out and left to die. It was he who defied everyone's wishes to have her imprisoned, who sliced through magic and machinery in order to release her and catch her in his arms.

Squall has always been the one saved her, who held her and protected her, who kept her from crumbling beneath her fears.

Now it was her turn.

Rinoa reached up and brushed a strand of hair away from his face and cradled his cheek on her palm. He closed his eyes at the warmth of her touch. Encouraged, she lifted herself up and kissed him. He was hesitant at first, but whenever he tried to recoil, she rejected his defiance and pulled him closer. She kept kissing him and quietly willed for him to let her in.

Little by little, he gave in, and Rinoa slowly felt his tension trickling away. The passion that was abruptly interrupted from moments ago slowly found its way back between them, except this time, there were many more things there than mere heat. There was warmth. There was tenderness.

There was love.

_I'm here, Squall._.. She said in her mind.

_I'm here..._

_I'm not gonna go away..._

_I'm not gonna disappear..._

_I'm here..._

_I'll always be here..._

Rinoa felt him melting against her now, and when she was confident that he was ready, she remembered one last thing she needed to do. Gently, she pushed him back, making way for both of them to sit up. Even in the midst of their mutual trance, she felt her cheeks color at the thought of what she was about to do. With a timid smile, she reached down to the hem of her shirt and slipped it off.

A small breath escaped Squall as he beheld her, astonished by the thought that he could see her. He could see _all_ of her.

Rinoa inched closer and kissed him, beckoning slowly for him to take off his shirt. He welcomed her request and pulled his shirt over his head.

There was a moment of awe between th two of them when they both realized that they were now completely revealed to each other. Rinoa looked into Squall's eyes one more time and now saw that his fears have melted away. This time, he kissed her first, and as he did, she let herself fall back against the pillows.

Squall's body electrified as he felt their bodies touch. Every inch explored was another wall torn down, another icy layer dissolved, another roaring lion tamed. Little by little, he melted away until there was only her. He surrendered himself to her completely, succumbing to her protection, letting her break down his walls in the way that only she ever could.


End file.
